The Public Perception of The Military

United Service Organizations (USO) clubs are also a thing of the past. The old adage of “Women Love a Man in Uniform” went out during Vietnam. When soldiers came back home, they were called baby killers after the Viet Cong strapped bombs to small children and sent them into American camps to kill Americans.

Sure, “Women Love a Man in Uniform” if he is wearing a police uniform or a firefighter uniform. After 9-11, I can’t tell you how many guys I knew who falsely told women that they were police officers or firefighters to have women swoon over them. It made me sick.

Think about the public perception of the military. They stand at busy intersections wearing fatigues, holding signs “Homeless. Will Work for Food.” The media talks about the high rate of soldier suicides and homeless veterans. News stories constantly tell us the high number of military members coming home from multiple tours in Iraq and Afghanistan with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), domestic violence/spouse abuse, substance abuse, etc.

Whenever there is a hostage situation, the media reports that the alleged perpetrator is former military. To single women, anyone who has been in the military has psychological and emotional issues. This is not the case for the majority of those who have served in the military.

For those of us still serving, dating is quite a challenge. The Army has social events such as Army balls and dining-outs. These are formal black tie and gown events which are mandatory events for the senior enlisted soldiers and officers which are held throughout the year.

The rank-and-file call these events “mandatory fun” which means everyone must show up and stay for the mandatory three hours. Then an announcement is made – “This concludes Part One of tonight’s program. You may leave at this time or stay for Part Two of tonight’s program for your music and dancing pleasure.”

I don’t look forward to these Formal Events. A few years ago, my absence at a Brigade dining-out at Fort Dix, N.J., was noticed by my Battalion Command Sergeant Major. He asked me why I did not attend the dining-out. I told him the truth that I could not find a date. He told me that at my level I needed to be at these events.

The first thing one learns in the military is not to volunteer for anything. From then on, his boss, the Brigade Command Sergeant Major, made sure that I attended these formal events. When he found out that I worked in radio broadcasting, he made me the master of ceremonies so then I had to show up at the dining-outs. I became the person who made the announcement, “This concludes Part One of tonight’s program…” Lucky me.

I call these “adult proms.” You arrive with your guest and have your portrait taken, eat, listen to a few remarks, and dance. However, trying to find a woman to go to the Army Ball is another story. I cannot tell you how many women have told me they would love to go to the Army Ball only to cancel on me.

Women today do not like the “clean cut” military guy. They prefer the “bad boy” image . If you are a non-smoker and non-drinker, forget it. Women perceive you as “B-O-R-I-N-G.” I am not looking for sympathy. I am just telling you about the public perception of the military.

If you are trying to get a date, don’t tell women you are in the military. You will have a better chance of getting a date. People may not realize it, but we owe a lot to our veterans.

Paul M. Blitz writes about veterans’ issues and politics for various publications.